Showing posts with label Open Door. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Open Door. Show all posts

Sunday, December 4, 2016

While We Wait: November 2016 (Month #11)

Adoption related stuff:

Okay, technically this happened December 1st, but close enough! The big recent news is that we are now officially in a second "pool" for waiting parents - yayyyy! Open Door adoption agency gave us the green light on December 1st that we are now an "active" waiting family with them, meaning that they can show our profile book to any expectant moms who might be interested in a family like ours. We're really happy about this, and also relieved that for the time being paperwork is DONE!!!

We have an online profile with Open Door, here: http://www.opendooradoption.org/daniel-and-bethany. Screenshot:



It's similar to our printed profile book, but with a few less pictures. There might be more text though (there's a lot more than what shows up with the screen shot). As with the hard-copy book, it was tough to decide on which pictures to show, and what to say! This part of the process has felt very vulnerable to us, having to show who we are to a prospective birth parent through "static" pictures and text - what pictures to choose? who should be in them? close-ups? formal? and so on. Writing up our story really puts ourselves out there, too. We've become pretty comfortable talking about our hope to adopt, our struggle with infertility, etc., but it still feels a little scary to be so open! We have to keep reminding ourselves: it's not about being perfect (whatever that means) but about being the best fit for someone who chooses us to raise their child (what an awesome responsibility!).

So what happens now? We keep waiting! (naturally) We are still working with St. Joseph's, our original placement agency, but could now receive calls from Open Door as well. There's nothing left to "do" at this point from our end in terms of paperwork or preparations. For the first time in a while, it looks like we really will be just waiting, living our lives while we wait and see when and where our adoption will happen.

Speaking of waiting, a friend of ours from grad school wrote a beautiful reflection on waiting that we wanted to share: https://blessedisshe.net/the-most-wonderful-time-of-the-year-2/. The line that really jumped out at us was  "I’ve come to view waiting not as something to breeze through as quickly as humanly possible, but as something to be embraced and be transformed by."



That is our prayer, too! That this time of waiting (which from a human perspective feels longer every day) will not be just a holding pattern or a "blank" time, or something we rush through as quickly as possible (not that we have much control over that) but a time that transforms us by the grace of God to be the people - and hopefully one day the parents - that he has called us to be.

Thank you for your continued prayers!

Other Stuff We Did:

We were cultured this month! Bethany went to see Mary Poppins at a local theater with a dear friend whose sister was in the show. Then we both went to the Symphony thanks to free tickets through Dan's PhD program. And finally for Bethany's birthday, Dan took her to see the Nutcracker, which was playing just a few minutes from our house.

Bethany travelled to Baltimore for an annual work trip and Dan joined her for a few days. Despite being a work trip, this one always has some lovely moments of time spent with coworkers "off the clock" and time for sightseeing.

View of the harbor from the 37th floor of the World Trade Center


Dan took the helm!
We also travelled to Pennsylvania to visit Bethany's family over Thanksgiving. We got TWO big Thanksgiving-day meals, one at a big extended family reunion, and one at Bethany's childhood home. We also saw a movie together ("Arrival" - excellent), did a family craft (making evergreen baskets), watched a lot of football (let's not talk about that) and just enjoyed relaxing with mom, dad, and their hyperactive dog Penny.

Pre-food coma

Penny did not contribute to this project
Finally, Bethany had a birthday! This year it was on the first Sunday of Advent, which was delightful. We got our home ready for this beautiful season of joy, peace, and WAITING (perhaps the Lord would like to teach us something new about this!). And Dan made Bethany's birthday SO special: breakfast out at a lovely local cafe, the Nutcracker in the afternoon, and a homemade dinner at night plus the world's smallest birthday cake (which was fine with her after eating so many sweets during Thanksgiving!).

O Come, O Come, Emmanuel

All two bites were delicious
We hope you had a lovely November, Thanksgiving, and a blessed start to Advent!

Sunday, November 6, 2016

While We Wait: October 2016 (Month #10)

Adoption related stuff:

We made some forward progress in October! To be honest, though, generally our adoption pilgrimage has felt like the joke in the Family Circus cartoons, where Billy takes the most circuitous route possible to accomplish a straight-forward task...


Image result for family circus dotted line
(link if the picture doesn't show up)

Not that adoption is every really "straight-forward" - but this round-about, detour-filled, will-we-ever-reach-the-finish-line image resonates with us!

Back to the forward progress though: praise God, Dan's CPS clearance form was finally located, processed, sent back to our agency, and we are once again home study approved! (Oct. 11) Awesome good news that we were grateful to receive. The home study is current for one year, FYI.

Because of our home study being active, we were able to pursue our plan of signing up with an additional placement agency to help us find our child. The agency we settled on, after much prayer and discussion, is An Open Door, in Georgia. They were highly recommended by our home study agency, Barker, and all of our interactions with them have been great: responsive, clear, and helpful. A few reasons why we chose them are: they directly work with the expectant parents who are considering adoption, which means that we will get the most accurate and complete information possible about a potential match; they have a cap for their fees + birthparent and legal fees, which for us means that we do not put money "at risk" in the event of a match or placement that falls through; they have multiple locations around Georgia (we had to send them 20 copies of our profile book); and their agency is fairly active, which could mean a shorter waiting time from this point forward.

It's another leap of faith, another "yes" to where we believe God is calling us, but expanding our "reach" in this way brings us a lot of hope!

We have a few things left before being totally active with Open Door: six references have to send them back a reference questionnaire, and we have to send them pictures and text to put on their website ("waiting couples"). So here's hoping that works out quickly!

Also, in a really unexpected adoption moment, Dan won $500 at a local shopping center's grand opening! He had to take a picture with a concrete turtle (it's a long story) and his name was selected. A little boost to our adoption budget!

Dan & Tommy


Other Stuff We Did

October was pretty fun! The Fall colors are just starting to show here in our neck of the woods, and we enjoyed two weekend trips: one to Erie to visit Dan's family, and one to Rochester to become godparents to our dear little godson Theo.


Speaking of godchildren - good friends came to visit for a weekend in October (including our goddaughter and Bethany's godson). We had a blast going to the zoo on a beautiful Fall day, making our traditional big pancake breakfast, and going to Annapolis to watch the boats. It is such a blessing to be with great friends!




Dan had a BIG event at his job (St. John Paul II Shrine) on JPII's feast day, Oct. 22. Bethany's parents came down for it, which was really fun. It was an all-day celebration of this great saint's life with speakers, music, a beautiful Mass, adoration, etc. It was a lovely day for us and a great cap to the novena we had been saying for JPII's intercession.

JPII, we love you!
Finally - we had our first Halloween in our new house! Bethany in particularly was really excited to hand out candy. At our last house, we didn't get many trick or treaters because we were on a busy road with no sidewalk. This time we had plenty! It was fun to sit on our porch with some hot tea and enjoy all the kids' costumes. Although our neighbors across the street really outdid us with decorations....we will need to remedy that next year.

Thank you for your continued prayers!